Discord

How could an alien possibly take over a student's minutes presentation for English class? Well, they plan E.T. beforehand.

An alien decided to crash English teacher Dermot Hannon’s first period British Literature class, initially masquerading as a senior by the name of Bruno Mars.

Unfortunately for the alien, this was not a class that did minutes.

Hannon was immediately unamused and attempted to shoo Mars out of the room, but was zapped with a bolt of cerulean electricity in retaliation. The students thought it was only a stage effect and laughed uncontrollably when Hannon sank limply into his chair.

The alien became aware of a particular student who was, like Hannon, unamused at the spectacle. She was wearing large, dark circular lenses in order to conceal her fatigue. A perfect target for what he had to say.

Sardonically, he asked her, “Why are you wearing sunglasses in here? Your future can’t possibly be that bright.”

Angered, she threw her shades at him in petty reply, but they deflected off of him and back onto her desk, split into two perfect moons. A few students attempted to rise from their seats, but they were glued down to their chairs. Despite being physically grounded, everyone’s consciousness went beyond and into the clouds.

It was Hannon’s doing. Fortunately, the chair that he had sunk into previously was equipped with wheels. The vibrations emitting from Mars’s voice caused them to roll ever so slightly, snapping Hannon out of hypnosis. Though still glued to his chair, he had not been rendered entirely immobile.

Using his legs to propel the chair, Hannon grabbed Mars and threw him out of the window. Mars fell into the UFO that he had parked upon the Hudson. Irritated that his plan had been foiled, in Zeus-inspired anger, he flung another bolt of cerulean electricity. This time, it hit the sky, causing the downpour of the decade to envelop NYC. An unidentifiable flying [musical] object, Mars’s presence became just another forgotten record.