Humor
Programming Office Pandemonium
The programming office has just announced their changes to the course selection process! Here’s all you need to know…
APocalypse: Dawn of the Exams
By Diya Mallu
Reason behind AP exams found to be…controlling Zombie outbreaks?!
Graphing Calculator Bugs Appearing All Over the Student Body
By Aahan Shah
The graphing calculators are causing academic disaster.
Internet Troubles Trouble Stuy
Stuyvesant students and teachers explain their experiences with not being able to access the internet after Spring Break.
What New York Animal Are You?
Find out what animal best fits your personality after answering these 10 questions!
Students Explain What They Did On the SAT Day
By Mark Ionis
What does a day in the life of a Stuy student look like when there's no classes to restrain them?
The Feebie Jeebies and Facebook Junkies
By Nabiha Islam
The curse of the Feebie Jeebies often plague Stuyvesant students as they turn into Facebook Junkies at the start of a new semester.
Yes to the Dress? No, THE SUIT IS MOOT!
By Eshaal Ubaid
In light of a fairly niche senior prom theme, some students are excited to glam up! Others, however, have some more unconventionality up their sleeves…
Heyday of a Hardened Halal Cart Criminal
By Selina Lin
The life of a halal cart driver on the run from the law.
It’s Time to Lock In: Tips For All Your AP Exams
By Michelle Huang, Tamiyyah Shafiq
IT’S TIME TO LOCK IN FOR YOUR AP EXAMS AHHHHH
SING: The Board Game is Coming to a Store Near You!
SING has been board-game-ified! Read on to learn how to play this exciting new game!
Are Leap Years Real? Scientists Want You to Think That!
By Selina Lin
Scientists invented leap years in order to get more vacation time.
Half Floor Renovated to Become Whole Floor
By Erica Liu
Freshman caucus co-president and cameraman film a video tour of the newly renovated Whole Half Floor.
Writing Your SSR: One That Worked
By Michelle Huang, Tamiyyah Shafiq
Every junior student submits an SSR (Secondary School Report) form to help their guidance counselor write an SSR for them for colleges. Here is one SSR that worked.
Big Sib Program Expands To Include Parental Roles
By Erica Liu
The Big Sib Program expands to include parental roles.
Our Editors Are So Erratic
By Daniella Solomon, Samantha Ruinsky
Exposing the atrocities of the Humor department during Disrespectator season.
Senior SING! Plunders Pants From the Competition
By Adeline Sauberli, Michelle Huang, Munem Tajwar
The Class of 2024 finally eeks out a SING! win, at the costs of the audience’s wills to live.
Help! I’m Trapped in the Junior SING! Exhibit, and Now I’m Forced to Watch PDA!
How unhinged can a night at the museum really be? Junior SING! shows you that… and then some!
New Achievement Unlocked, Recently!
Staying overnight at school, you’re finally able to execute your master plan.
Sophfrosh SING!: Holy Cow!
By Gabriella Hoefner, Michelle Huang, Munem Tajwar
We loved the cows so much! Oh, and there were also some songs and dances, I guess? Sorry, I fell asleep.
A Snackless Stuy: Eric Adams’s Budget Cuts Forces School to Sell All Vending Machines
By Eshaal Ubaid
The DOE’s budget cuts force Stuy to sell all of its vending machines, the lifeline of fast-paced and hungry students.
Villainous Valentine Vendettas: What REALLY Happens to the Gifts That Never Make it to Your Homerooms
The truth of what happened to the Valentine’s gifts that never made it to your homeroom is finally revealed.
The Escalator Disaster
The Humor Department investigates the sinister cause of malfunctioning escalators.
How to Get Disowned by Your Children: Worst Holiday Gifts EVER The Spectator / Humor / Issue 10
By Aahan Shah
Describing the five worst Christmas gifts people got.
Best Ultimate Rizz Lines to Get You a Girlfriend or Boyfriend
By Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Maisha Thakur
Focus Sentence:
From the Mayor’s Office: Goodbye to Cookies, Reading, and Staten Island
Mayor Adams, if you can read this, please don’t take away our milk.
Real Date v.s. AI Partner: Which One is Better?
Comparing and contrasting a real significant other with an AI chatbot to see which is better.
This Is What I Wrote Instead of Studying for AP Psych
By Erica Liu
Two students present psychology demonstrations to an audience.
Programming Office Pandemonium
The programming office has just announced their changes to the course selection process! Here’s all you need to know…
APocalypse: Dawn of the Exams
By Diya Mallu
Reason behind AP exams found to be…controlling Zombie outbreaks?!
Graphing Calculator Bugs Appearing All Over the Student Body
By Aahan Shah
The graphing calculators are causing academic disaster.
Internet Troubles Trouble Stuy
Stuyvesant students and teachers explain their experiences with not being able to access the internet after Spring Break.
What New York Animal Are You?
Find out what animal best fits your personality after answering these 10 questions!
It’s Time to Lock In: Tips For All Your AP Exams
By Michelle Huang, Tamiyyah Shafiq
IT’S TIME TO LOCK IN FOR YOUR AP EXAMS AHHHHH
Students Explain What They Did On the SAT Day
By Mark Ionis
What does a day in the life of a Stuy student look like when there's no classes to restrain them?
The Feebie Jeebies and Facebook Junkies
By Nabiha Islam
The curse of the Feebie Jeebies often plague Stuyvesant students as they turn into Facebook Junkies at the start of a new semester.
Yes to the Dress? No, THE SUIT IS MOOT!
By Eshaal Ubaid
In light of a fairly niche senior prom theme, some students are excited to glam up! Others, however, have some more unconventionality up their sleeves…
Heyday of a Hardened Halal Cart Criminal
By Selina Lin
The life of a halal cart driver on the run from the law.
Inside the Stuyvesant Speech & Debate Team
By Eshaal Ubaid
We sent special investigators into the speech & debate team, perhaps to uncover their unnerving secrets.
Welcome to Stuyvesant University!
Stuyvesant High School accidentally invites college students to the open house.
Our Editors Are So Erratic
By Daniella Solomon, Samantha Ruinsky
Exposing the atrocities of the Humor department during Disrespectator season.
Senior SING! Plunders Pants From the Competition
By Adeline Sauberli, Michelle Huang, Munem Tajwar
The Class of 2024 finally eeks out a SING! win, at the costs of the audience’s wills to live.
SING: The Board Game is Coming to a Store Near You!
SING has been board-game-ified! Read on to learn how to play this exciting new game!
Help! I’m Trapped in the Junior SING! Exhibit, and Now I’m Forced to Watch PDA!
How unhinged can a night at the museum really be? Junior SING! shows you that… and then some!
New Achievement Unlocked, Recently!
Staying overnight at school, you’re finally able to execute your master plan.
Sophfrosh SING!: Holy Cow!
By Gabriella Hoefner, Michelle Huang, Munem Tajwar
We loved the cows so much! Oh, and there were also some songs and dances, I guess? Sorry, I fell asleep.
Are Leap Years Real? Scientists Want You to Think That!
By Selina Lin
Scientists invented leap years in order to get more vacation time.
Half Floor Renovated to Become Whole Floor
By Erica Liu
Freshman caucus co-president and cameraman film a video tour of the newly renovated Whole Half Floor.
A Snackless Stuy: Eric Adams’s Budget Cuts Forces School to Sell All Vending Machines
By Eshaal Ubaid
The DOE’s budget cuts force Stuy to sell all of its vending machines, the lifeline of fast-paced and hungry students.
Villainous Valentine Vendettas: What REALLY Happens to the Gifts That Never Make it to Your Homerooms
The truth of what happened to the Valentine’s gifts that never made it to your homeroom is finally revealed.
Writing Your SSR: One That Worked
By Michelle Huang, Tamiyyah Shafiq
Every junior student submits an SSR (Secondary School Report) form to help their guidance counselor write an SSR for them for colleges. Here is one SSR that worked.
The Escalator Disaster
The Humor Department investigates the sinister cause of malfunctioning escalators.
Big Sib Program Expands To Include Parental Roles
By Erica Liu
The Big Sib Program expands to include parental roles.
The Rizzler’s Revenge
By Diya Mallu
A Stuyvesant high school student, fed up with love, tries to cause magical hatred, only to have his plan backfire horribly.
How to Get Disowned by Your Children: Worst Holiday Gifts EVER The Spectator / Humor / Issue 10
By Aahan Shah
Describing the five worst Christmas gifts people got.
Best Ultimate Rizz Lines to Get You a Girlfriend or Boyfriend
By Fiona 'Eve' Lin, Maisha Thakur
Focus Sentence:
Opposite Day
By Jake Chan
A burnt-out Stuyvesant student ends up in a Stuy completely different than the one they know.
From the Mayor’s Office: Goodbye to Cookies, Reading, and Staten Island
Mayor Adams, if you can read this, please don’t take away our milk.