Minutes Ideas to Try at Home

Whoever decided to make teenagers go through show and tell every single day under the pretense that it helps refresh their memory must’ve been high. If you’ve been to kindergarten, you would know the PTSD that follows a stressful day of showing people things. Minutes gifts are always either a hit or miss, both of which are very awkward. With each teacher in the English department having different standards for minutes, it’s always a breath of fresh toxic gas air every year to see what you’ll have to go through from then on. Of course, each student has his or her own style of presenting, from the awkward silences to the five-minutes-before-class creations; the world of minutes is vast. Today, in order to help you along your journey, we bring you our top five minutes ideas.

The Five Minutes Before Class

This is a classic and simple gift for the typical attentive class, a surefire way to make them go to sleep. All you have to do is Wikipedia something about your book. Now you can say, “Did you know that Holden Caulfield’s middle name is Morrisey? Now you know!” With that, you can be sure that you have given your classmates very important information they really needed to know. Armed with your gift, your classmates will finally be able to understand the complexity of “The Catcher in the Rye”!

An alternative of the Five Minutes Before Class is the famous “eye-opening” (figuratively and literally) and popular stick figure art. Avant-garde art depicts a new side of you and can further explain the sublimity of the books that you are reading. An avant-garde picture of a dog can explain what goes on in the mind of Christopher from “The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time”! Though this book is short, your Five Minutes Before Class can clearly depict this story in a picture. (Don’t try this!)

The last alternative is the famous poetry for the class. This type of gift may include haikus. This is usually an amazing gift as it gives the class some extra literature you pulled off the Internet to enjoy! To utilize this strategy, simply Google “Hubris Poem” and now you have a free minutes gift for “Julius Caesar” and half of the other books you read.

The Artist

This gift is a classic, for both artistic and lazy students. With this style of minutes, you have two options: you can either actually put in effort and create something that looks good so it can go in the teacher’s personal art gallery, or you can just bull-feces it and create something lazy. From our (my) personal experience—when I used two hours to create some *koff koff* art—I highly recommend this minutes idea. Either way, the class still has to clap as your work gets passed around and eventually collected by the teacher for them to look at for a few seconds before they get on with their class. Definitely go with this route if you’re a good artist (or not, it doesn’t really matter).

Something everybody must enjoy is the “I am a very bad drawer” excuse as they proceed to present us with the best avant-two-second-drawing-stickman-garde drawings. We fully support all artists no matter the skill as we (I) have committed these sins.

The Food Plug

Honestly, I am still not sure if the people giving out the food actually make it. People often just show up with cookies or cake with no tie whatsoever to the book, and everyone’s happier. It’s free food and an easy minutes gift, provided you aren’t the one making the food. Minutes that were supposed to take under three minutes suddenly take five.

However, as much as I think food gifts are very unfair to those who do not know how to cook or have a Cooking Mama, I fully approve of it. The sugar helps people like us (me) survive the rest of the day, and we (I) will always look forward to the extra sugar. If you decide to use this method, always make sure it has no nuts (and that a parent is home).

The Book Plug

“I read this in fifth grade and so should you!” —Ryan Wang (permission was received without using violence)

The Essay (with an awkward silence)

Hey, sisters! This afternoon, I'm here to give yesterday afternoon’s minutes that recaps what went on during yesterday afternoon’s class. The day before today, we had a discussion about what we had read the night before until we discussed again with our partners about the same section of the book. We then had a short read-aloud where we read the passage that we had just discussed very slowly as we cycled through every student in the class… (the rest of the minutes is on repeat).

And this rambles on for a whole five minutes. This really helps you remember what happened the day before, as you probably completely forgot about everything after you slept.

Do you disagree with our picks or think we left anything out of our top five list? If so, please DM us on Messenger with your feedback! If you like our list, make sure you like and subscr—I mean, tell that to our editors! And as always, see you in the next article! (If we survive the backlash.)

*We’re so sorry about this article. Please don’t lower our grades, English department :)?