PCP: The Other Racist White Thing

The following was written and then cut from Breitbart.

The Racism of L’actose

Every day you walk into the lunchroom, wait on a long line, and get milk. But, for approximately 87.568% of people at Stuyvesant, this isn’t an option. Why? Because they’re l’actose intolerant. Dictionary.com defines lactose intolerant as “unable to digest lactose (milk sugar) due to a deficiency of lactase, an enzyme for metabolization of lactose.”

Many might ask why the cafeteria continues to serve milk despite many being unable to consume it. It’s because white people can process lactose at higher rates than people of color. The DOE should stop serving milk in schools because firstly it is racist, secondly it’s a waste of cash, and thirdly its inhumanity.

Fist, milk is racist. This is true because milk is only consumed by white people. According to Livestock Weekly, a weekly publication about livestock, “

‘Tens of millions’ of African-Americans, Latinos, Asians, and Native Americans cannot properly absorb milk products into their bloodstream.” This means that when we give tax dollars to buy milk for schools, we are really just perpetuating decades, if not centuries-long racist institutions by only making sure white people can get all the food they need. That’s racism. 😠

Next, remember that because milk cannot be consumed by everyone (only white people), the Unites STate wastes a literal ton of money on food. That’s not just me being crass, that’s legit. According to the NRDC, the US ends up throwing away about 40% of food. But, if we were to stop funding racist milk in schools, we wouldnt waste as much food because people of colours wouldn’t have to throw away the milk they get in school because their allergic. If you want taxes to go down and schools food delivery systems to be more affective, we should stop serving milk in cafeterias.

Finally, the United States should stop serving milk in schools because the way milk is raised is odee sad. Farmer’s Bi-Weekly reports that in order for milk to be raised, they need to juice a cow?!?!?! Wtf how is that natural. The institute for pharmacological research studies explains that in order for milk to be produced in the quantities that modern america demands, cows need to take lots of anti-bacterial drugs that result in them having weaker immune systems and overall shorter lives. But, if we decreased the amount of milk that the government bought from these farmers, then these farmers won’t need to use these harmful anti-bacterial products. That means cows will be happier, healthier, and those who do drink milk (white devils) will have better quality milk that is less likely to contain harmful chemicals like PDH-4/20-69.

THank you for reading my argument about why milk should not be served in the cafeteria. If we were to not serve milk, we would end structural racism, solve america’s wasted food crisis, and save cows. tHank you and good night.

WHALES

Mr. Speaker, the honourable gentleman would have you believe that milk is racist, but little does he know that the real racism in our society comes from homogenizing milk. That’s indigenous genocide! Much like people, milk naturally comes in all colors, from vanilla to chocolate to starberry. Some even come without l’actose and are from free-range, non-GMO, pesticide-free, gluten-free, farmer-free farms.

L’actose, in fact, is an important protein. You need milk to make gainz. Now, a lot of people will say that gainz are bad because people just use them to punch nazis, but I say if richard spencer is gonna have that haircut, he deserves a punc.h. Without milk, how would we take action against the alt-right? checkmate.

You might think cows are a big problem, but they’re’s a bigger mammal. Whales. You ever drink whale milk?? That ish nasty. According to the Huffington Post, .0008% of the population drinks whale milk, contributing to 0.0317 whales dying annually. At the end of the day, you need to weigh juicing cows versus killing whales, and I’d say whales are a bigger problem.

Even l’actose carrying ships are dangerous for whales. Recently I watched an documentarie entitled "Sonic Sea," which discusses underwater noise pollution. According to Sonic Sea, the single biggest issue under the umbrella topic of underwater noise pollution is the effect that loud commercial shipping vessels are having on whale communication. If the pollution is loud enough, in an attempt to swim away, whales can have hemorrhaging in their brains and bleed out. Otherwise, young whales can be prevented from communicating with their mothers, leaving them more vulnerable to attack.

Have you ever heard of whale pollution? Nope. Because it’s all a corporate plot to sell you milk. Illuminati confirmed.

Hemorrhaging > indigestion from l’actose. So yes, milk is a problem — but for whales, not people of color.

**Drops mic**