Cardiac Arrests From the Nether

Some heart-melting lines to pick up your crush (or for yourself, if you’re in the mood for some healthy narcissism).

“Your hand looks heavy. Can I hold it for you?” —Nour Kastoun, senior

“Are you a cat? ‘Cause I’m feline this connection.” —Vicky Liu, senior

“Are you an orphanage? Because I want to give you kids.” —Kai Mandelbaum, senior

“Are you from Tennessee? ‘Cause you’re the only 10 I see.” —Bella Rosen, sophomore

“You’re hotter than the Bunsen burner I burned my hand with during lab.” —Erica Liu, sophomore

“If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.” —Aharnish Dev, sophomore

“You’re proof that aliens are real, because I think you just abducted my heart.” —Nicole Chen, junior

“I heard you are good at algebra. Can you replace my ex without asking why?” —Megan Yan, junior

“Are you the police? Because you put my heart under cardiac arrest.” —Kalani Ho, junior

“I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us together.” —Perry Huang, junior

“Are you a drum? Because I’m hitting on you.” —Yarza Aung, sophomore

“I believe in following my dreams. Can I have your Instagram?” —Evelyn Chen, junior

“Hey, can I take a picture of you? I just wanna show Santa what I want for Christmas.” —Celina Huynh, senior

“If you were a booger, I’d pick you.” —Nordel W. Delma, freshman

“I would rate you a nine out of 10, because I’m the one you need.” —Cindy Ye, freshman

“We have a class together, right? I think we should take chemistry.” —Nada Hameed, junior

“I’m not currently an organ donor, but I’d be happy to give you my heart.” —Maggie Sansone, junior

“Is your name Google? Because you’re everything I’m searching for.” —Sarah Diaz, sophomore

“Are we in physics together? Because we don’t have chemistry.” —Krista Proteasa, senior

“Are you an exception? Let me catch you.” —Charles Hua, sophomore

“Are you a structure that impedes water movement? Because, like, damn.” —Lucien Clough, sophomore

“Are you a bucket of wet cement? ‘Cause woah.” —Lily Serry, sophomore

“Are you from the Nether? ‘Cause you’re hot ;).” —Edwin He, junior

“I would invite you to a movie, but they don’t let you bring your own snacks.” —Ellen Wright, freshman