Eshaal Ubaid (eshaal-ubaid)

eubaid40 [ at ] stuy [ dot ] edu

Eshaal Ubaid ('24) is a Humor writer. She loves making people laugh because it's very validating and ego-boosting! She also enjoys biology, drawing, and the speech team.

Inside the Stuyvesant Speech & Debate Team

We sent special investigators into the speech & debate team, perhaps to uncover their unnerving secrets.

Issue 13, Volume 114

Yes to the Dress? No, THE SUIT IS MOOT!

In light of a fairly niche senior prom theme, some students are excited to glam up! Others, however, have some more unconventionality up their sleeves…

Issue 13, Volume 114

A Snackless Stuy: Eric Adams’s Budget Cuts Forces School to Sell All Vending Machines

The DOE’s budget cuts force Stuy to sell all of its vending machines, the lifeline of fast-paced and hungry students.

Issue 11, Volume 114

Totally Outta Pocket: Quotes from Stuyvesant Teachers

A crowdsourced montage of wise words from our dearest educators!

Issue 7, Volume 114

The Fresh Ghost of Stuy-Aire

You’ve heard of Chucky and the Grunge. Now meet: CARL.

Issue 4, Volume 114

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Best, A Tired Senior

This whole email guideline thing is getting outta hand…

Issue 2, Volume 114

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Kenvesant High School

Embrace the Mojo Dojo Casa life with Kenergy.

Issue 1, Volume 114

How NOT to Get a College Rec

College is in, desperation is out: here’s what you should NOT say to any teacher you hope to garner respect, or more importantly—you selfish student—a rec from.

Issue 17, Volume 113

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She’s Everything. He’s Just in Her Cult of Personality.

Sigma male grindset? Pfft, I’m on a Glitterific Barbie Mindset.

Issue 14, Volume 113

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Love at First ID Scan (Stuyvesant X Reader) (HighSchool!AU)

When a bad boy with no safety schools and a polite gentleman who does the bare minimum collide with Y/N, who will she choose?

Issue 12, Volume 113

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So You Want “W Rizz”

Pick up maidens or hand in your letter of rizzignation.

Issue 9, Volume 113

Seung Yu 2024

The perfect candidate for presidency has been right beneath our noses all along.

Issue 7, Volume 113

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ThankLESS Giving, 2022

Giving thanks is hard—why not complain instead?

Issue 6, Volume 113

Wow, You HAVE to Visit These 10 Stuyvesant Monuments! [NOT CLICKBAIT]

Alexander Chu, Eshaal Ubaid

Cancel your Paris plans—we’re giving you a tour of THE Stuyvesant High School!

Issue 2, Volume 113

“Stuyvesant? In THIS Economy?”

Faced with dying economy and crippling inflation rates, Stuyvesant High School tyrannically imposes taxes onto popular hangout spots.

Issue 1, Volume 113

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The SU Follows Up New Voting System With Gerrymandering

Maybe we should stick to low voter turnout…

Issue 15, Volume 112

Even Teachers Love “Stuy Crying Corner”

EVERYTHING IS PAIN.

Issue 14, Volume 112

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Students Review AP Courses on Yelp

Some of y’all are ruthless but CollegeBoard deserves it.

Issue 12, Volume 112

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Debating the Affirmative Side (My Love For You)

The simple folk say “no, I love YOU more! Heehee!,” but the sophisticated research and debate their cases.

Issue 10, Volume 112

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Spotify Wrapped 2021

Ready to get exposed for every reason you’re scared of revealing your playlist?

Issue 8, Volume 112

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To the Chambers Street Station: A Modern Odyssey

Issue 7, Volume 112

A-nya-lizing the Catboy Maid Invasion

Alexander Chu, Eshaal Ubaid

Our experts here at the Spectator are paw-sitive that this is no cat-incidence

Issue 6, Volume 112

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What Your Favorite Music Genre Says About You!

Erica Chen, Eshaal Ubaid

From incoherent screaming to the pretentious world of Mozart, your playlist says a lot about how un-okay you are!

Issue 5, Volume 112

The Chilling Tale of Locker 666

Alexander Chu, Eshaal Ubaid

When Stuy’s creepiest hotspots start acting up, who you gonna call? Off-brand ghostbusters Alex & Eshaal!

Issue 4, Volume 112

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Desk Vandalism: A New Messaging Medium

Desk vandal buddies don’t invade the privacy of other desk vandal buddies. It’s so not cool.

Issue 3, Volume 112

Arguing with Some Loser on Twitter

Fighting IRL just isn’t the same as attacking someone’s profile picture.

Issue 2, Volume 112

Arguing with Some Loser on Twitter

Fighting IRL just isn’t the same as attacking someone’s profile picture.

Issue 2, Volume 112

Oh God, Where’s the Exit?

Erica Chen, Eshaal Ubaid

Apparently, 10th graders (and literally everyone else) are just as lost as the freshly graduated sticky iPad kids.

Issue 1, Volume 112

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Talos Glitches, Gives Junior 23-Period Daily Schedule

At least we all get an extra free?

Issue 17, Volume 111

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Stuyvesant’s (Kinda) Got Talent!

Erica Chen, Eshaal Ubaid

To an evening of unmatched talent! The Freshman Caucus has a few words on the performances at this year’s virtual talent show.

Issue 15, Volume 111

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Stuyvesant, Sometime in the Distant Future

The year is 2050, and this reporter is wondering if Stuyvesant is truly different from any other tech-based school she has encountered.

Issue 13, Volume 111

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Inside the Stuyvesant Math Team

The esteemed Stuyvesant Math Team is found to be a chaotic place stocked with obscure inside jokes, a passion for Jamboard drawings, and a shared disdain for the CML.

Issue 12, Volume 111

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A Button for Everything

Following the discovery of a Diet Coke button in the Oval Office, we’re left to ponder: why stop at soda?

Issue 10, Volume 111

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